SPAM OF THE WEEK!

[estelle]

why don't ye blow HER up???

[playthatbeat]

OMFG!!! A PROFESSOR?! THIS HAS TO BE LEGIT??!?!111!

Date: Sat, 29 Dec 2007 04:49:09 -0800 (PST)
From: "prof halford" Add to Address Book Add Mobile Alert
Yahoo! DomainKeys has confirmed that this message was sent by yahoo.com. Learn more
Subject: FROM PROF HALFORD GET BACK ASAP................
To: XTechHubert@hotmail.com

From:PROF HALFORD
Address:8 Mitchley Road Tottenham London N17 9HG
Occupations: External Auditor
Hello,

Do accept my sincere apologies if my mail does not meet your personal ethics although, I wish to use this medium to get in touch with you first because it's fastest means.

I am an external auditor of a well known bank here in the United Kingdom.
In one of our periodic auditing I discorverd a dormant accounts with holding balance of 52,000,000(fifty two Million British Pounds) which has not been operated for the past three years. From my investigations and confirmations, the owner of this account, a foreigner by name mr.Gregory .B.Wilson died in plane crash in July 19,2003 and since then nobody has done anything as regards the claiming of this money because he has no family members who are aware of the existence of neither the account nor the funds.

I have secretly discussed this matter with a top senior minister official of the federal ministry of finance here and we have agreed to find a reliable foreign partner to deal with us although due to his position he did not want to take active part but as soon as you follow my instructions everything will be successful because we will be working hand in hand with him. We thus propose to do business with you, standing in as the next of kin of these funds from the deceased and after due legal processes have been followed the fund will be released to your account without delay and we will use it for investment and to assist the less privileged in the society because if we left the fund with the government it will be fortified for nothing and will be used to suppress the poor masses in the society.

This transaction is totally free of risk and troubles as the fund is legitimate and does not originate from drug, money laundry, terrorism or any other illegal act.Finally, I will give you 35% for your corporation,5% will be for expenses both parties might have incurred during this process. On receipt of your response I will furnish you with detailed clarification as it relates to this mutual benefit transaction.

You should send me Your account information as states below where you like the money to be transfer so that i can send application for the release of the fund immediately with your account information.Even an empty account is ok.

Bank Name..............
Bank Address...........
Beneficiary Name.......
Account Number.........
Swift Code.............
Your Tel/Fax Number....
Routing Number.........
State & Country........

I look forward to hear from you as soon as possible if you are interested.
Regards,
PROF HALFORD

[jasonmcareedj]

now that would get us some NYE party!

[playthatbeat]

WE HAVE CONTACT!!!!

McCabe recently had the following communications re: his selling of his old mobile phone on eBay!!!!


The Background: M8 of ours wanted to sell his old mobile on eBay, so he put it up with an attractive BUY IT NOW price, and...
------------------------------
Begin forwarded message:

> From: Fatima Richard
> Date: 14 January 2008 10:19:35 GMT
> To: [our man on the job]
> Subject: I Have Made Your Payment For Nokia N92 170185276291
>
> Hello Mark,
> Thank you for notifying me about this item i won.I
> want to inform you that i have paid suficient money
> for the shipment to my son address in Nigeria,West
> Africa after i won your item and it has been deducted
> on my account.The item is meant to be his birthday
> gift and i want it to be delivered to him ASAP.I would
> have sent it myself but i am out of town.And i want
> you to send the item to him on time today because i
> want him to receive it ASAP for his birthday purpose
> that is why i have paid for fast shipment to his place
> through Only Royalmail 1st class Recorded Delivery.I
> prefer Royalmail because they are fast,reliable and
> secure.
> This is his shipping address below:
> Name: Olu Richard
> Address: 38 Aina Street
> City: Ojota
> Zipcode: 23401
> State: Lagos
> Country: Nigeria.
> Awaiting your fast response to ship when you get
> confirmation of the payment.
> Regards.

LMFAO

[playthatbeat]

Then, THIS email arrives at our agent's addy:

-----------------------------------------------------------


From: "service@paypal.com"
Date: 14 January 2008 09:14:05 GMT
To: [our man on the scene]
Subject: Mrs Fatima Richard has sent you EUR 650.00 Cash with Pay Pal, Online Auction Payment Confirmation ID # 0775-1108-9321-3941-9139


PayPal
Dear Mark,

This email confirms that Mrs Fatima Richard, have paid mark@lolinterwebz.com EUR 650.00 using PayPal.

Make sure you never provide your password to fraudulent websites
You should never give your PayPal password to anyone, including PayPal employees.

Payment Details.


Item # Item Title Quantity Price Subtotal

170185276291
Nokia N92 1
EUR 550.00

EUR 550.00

Shipping & Handling via Standard Delivery to :
EUR 100.00
Shipping Insurance(included): EUR 0.00
Total: EUR 650.00


Note:This PayPal®payment has been deducted from the buyer's account and has been " APPROVED" but will not be credited to your account until the shipment tracking number is sent to our customers service@ online_assistance@consultant.com for shipment verification so as to secure both the seller and the buyer

Shipping Information: Verified.
Address:
Name: Olu Richard
Address: 38 Aina Street
City: Ojota
State: Lagos
Country: Nigeria
Zipcode: 23401

Address Status: Confirmed.




For more information on protecting yourself from fraud, please review our Security Tips at https://www.paypal............com/us/securitytips.
To safely and securely access the PayPal website or your account, open a new web browser (e.g. Internet Explorer or Netscape) and type in the PayPal URL ( https://www.paypal.com/us/) to be sure you are on the real PayPal site.:

0775-1108-9321-3941-9139

Get Verified – Your Key to More Security and Free Features
Get Verified and help increase the security of your PayPal transactions for yourself and for everyone with whom you do business. You can also:

* Fund purchases directly from your checking or savings account, in addition to using credit cards
* Improve your reputation by letting others know you're a confirmed, Verified member of the PayPal community
* Send money to friends, family, and PayPal Personal Account holders




Thank you for using PayPal!
The PayPal Team

Pay me securely with any major credit card through PayPal! PAYPAL PAYMENT VERIFIED.
PayPal Email ID PP307.

PayPal Account Review Department.

Thank you for using Paypal online Payments. We look forward to serving
your online payment needs in the future.

------------------------------------------

This is clearly a new development in Nigerian scamming - >> BLATENTLY FAKE PAYPAL CONFIRMATION EMAILS << - they are hoping we think "this is such a pile of shite, it CAN'T be a scam, nobody is that fuc*ing stupid.."

Natch, no payments appeared in our agent's PayPal a/c..

Lol.. Also: enjoy spamming this poor creature

[jasonmcareedj]

feckin hell, to be honest, i'd he in 2 minds about that one if it were me lol. i wonder who invented spamming...... it was prob someone trying to get votes or else a newsletter to subscribers and it evolved from all of the above.......

[as4]

419ers nicked

Script

Max penalty for mail & wire fraud in the US is 20 years in the clink.
Hate that!

[playthatbeat]

THIS looser got to my SECRET PERSONAL EMAIL!!

Now then, THIS one really exists - managed to get this into my personal (spamarrest-protected) account.. I should add, this is the First Spam i have seen at my Priv8 addy Since i switched to Sparrest as a filter over 3 years ago.. A monumental achievement that deserves the UPMOST fury.


>From Miss.Juliet Dunga
Abidjan-Cote d'ivoire
Email: julietdunga@centrum.cz

Dearest One,

I thank God for this opportunity to get in touch with you, I pray that my
decision to ask you for help would not be thrown to the wind. Introducing
myself, I am Juliet Dunga, the only daughter of Late Chief and Mrs.Frank
Dunga a businessman who based in Liberia and Abidjan-Cote d'ivoire who
sold Gold and exported Cocoa .My father was poisoned to death by his
business associates on one of their business trips.

But before the death of my father on the 29th April 2006 in a private
hospital here in Abidjan He secretly called me on his bed and told me that
he has a sum of USD $10.7M (Ten Million Seven Hundred Thousand United
States Dollars) deposited in a security company here in Abidjan-Cote D'
Ivoire, that he used my name as his beloved daughter for the next of kin
in depositing the fund.

Now I have decided to invest these money in your country or anywhere safe
enough outside Cote d'Ivoire for security and political reasons.I want you
to help me claim and retrieve this fund from the security company into
your personal account in your country for investment purposes.

Moreover,I am willing to offer you 20% of the total sum as compersation
for your effort and input after the successful transfer of this fund into
your nominated account overseas, I will be waiting to hear from you as
soon as this email get to you in good health. I am ready to send to you
every relevand documents including the certificate of deposit if i hear
from you as soon as possible.

Thanks and God bless you

Yours, Faithfully
Miss.Juliet Dunga.
Email: julietdunga@centrum.cz

[playthatbeat]

Lol Jobtime again..

From:
"Mr. Moon"
To:
info@mrspring.net
Date:
27/01/08 16:30
*
Hello,

*I * am * writing * to * draw * your * attention * to * the *flexi-time
accounting/clerical position available with our company.

*Elbrus *Fund, *Inc, *headquartered *in *Moscow *(Russia) *with *direct
representation *in *Lithuania *and *Cyprus, is a leading major Russian
proprietary *trader *and *trust *manager *company *. Our mission is to
provide *investors *with *reduced *emerging *market *risk and superior
returns *through *broad *diversification *and *conscious *risk-taking.
Currently, *we *are looking for skillful and communicative individuals
to *join the Receivables Team of our Finance & Infrastructure Group in
the *United *States *on part-time basis. This role involves monitoring
and *processing *of *funds *transfers *initiated by our North American
clients. *Your *duties will not involve any direct client interaction,
and *you *will *be *reporting to the Receivables department manager in
Russia. *We *are looking for numerate individuals who are also able to
multi-task *efficiently in a team. Relevant previous experience and/or
education is a plus, but not a prerequisite.

*Your remuneration is commission-based. You are expected to dedicate up
to 8 hours per week to your duties, part of is regular business hours.
Your *core responsibility will be to receive investment funds from our
North *American *clients *into *your designated account, reconcile the
payments *with *the *head *office and obtain transaction documentation
from *your *supervisor, *and transfer specified funds into our managed
investment *accounts *as instructed. You will be in charge of handling
daily *transaction-related *communications, such as obtaining transfer
status information from your bank or request confirmations and summary
activity reports on regular and ad hoc basis.

*The *position *is *home-based, *and no relocation is required from the
successful *candidate. *This *role *involves *flexible *working hours,
meaning that it is suitable for senior citizens or partially employed.

*You *will *be *offered *to *choose *between *2% *commission *available
immediately *and *2.5% *available *on *a monthly basis. If you opt for
immediate *payments, *you *will *receive *2% *(that is, $100 per every
$5,000) *of *the *gross *amount *of *each *transfer credited into your
account. *Alternatively, you may opt to receive 2.5% (that is $100 for
each *$4000) *of your monthly account turnover. We will also cover any
funds transfer fees.

*It *should be understood that being a foreign entity, RRH Finance, Inc
is *not subject to the US IRS supervision. You will thus be liable for
reporting *the *commissions *that *you *receive *as *your *personal or
business *income *as *required by the US tax legislation. It should be
underlined *that only your commission constitute a taxable income, and
not the total turnover on your account.

*It should also be underlined that all funds that you receive will come
from *verifiable entities within the US and Canada. The funds that you
handle *will *comprise *of *funds *submitted into trust management and
various *fees *that are charged on our clients. You will receive funds
via *electronic Wire transfer. This is the secure system used by major
US *banks *for *funds *and *securities *settlement. *No *funds will be
deposited *into *your *account unless the transaction is authorized by
the both your and investor's bank, Thus, there is no risk on your end.
You *will *never be required to cash a check, make a remittance before
the *funds *are *cleared *into *your *account *or *engage in any other
potentially risky activity.

*In *order *to *qualify *for *the *position, you must be a permanent US
resident *aged *21 *and *above and have a verifiable personal/business
banking relationship with a US bank. Since most communication with the
head *office *will *be *via *email/fax/phone, you should have reliable
access *to *these *facilities and be reachable during regular business
hours. *Business *owners *utilizing *business *bank *accounts *will be
subject to higher receivables turnover, and thus, higher commissions.
*
To apply for this position or to request additional information on our
company, *please *contact *us *at hr.elbrus@gmail.com Please make
sure to provide your contact phone number.

*Please *note *that only applicants under serious consideration will be
contacted.

[jasonmcareedj]

*take*the*job*

[playthatbeat]

CHARLES IS BACK!

From: "Charles Ndube" Add Mobile Alert
Subject: CONTACT FEDEX COURIER COMPANY
Date: Mon, 4 Feb 2008 15:11:07 +0100 (CET)
To:





Hello Dear,

I have Paid the fee for your Cheque Draft.but the manager of Eko Bank Benin told me that before the check will get to you that it will expire.So i told him to cash $1.500,000.00 all the necessary arrangement of delivering the $1.500,000.00 in cash was made with FEDEX DELIVERY COURIER COMPANY.This is the information they need to delivery your package to you.with FEDEX DELIVERY COURIER COMPANY, contact them now.
BELOW IS THE FEDEX DELIVERY COURIER COMPANY INFORMATION'S.


NAME:FEDEX COURIER DELIVERING COMPANY.
ATTANTION: PERSON: DR.Jerry Cook
POSITION: FOREIGN DELIVERY DEPARTMENT.
ADDRESS: COTONOU BENIN REPUBLIC
E-MAILfedex.courierltd86@yahoo.fr)
TELEPHONE:0022993773684


Please, Send them your contacts information to able them locate you immediately they arrived in your country with your BOX .This is what they need from you.


1.YOUR FULL NAME
2.YOUR HOME ADDRESS.
3.YOUR CURRENT HOME TELEPHONE NUMBER.
4.YOUR CURRENT OFFICE TELEPHONE.
5. YOUR CURRENT HOME TELEPHONE NUMBER.
6.A COPY OF YOUR PICTURE


Note that this is there E-mail contact (fedex.courierltd86@yahoo.fr)
Please make sure you send this needed info’s to the Director general of FEDEX DELIVERY COURIER COMPANY BENIN REPUBLIC, DR. Jerry Cook with the address given to you.


Note. The Fedex Delivery Courier Company don't know the contents of the Box. I registered it as a Box of an Africa cloths. They don't know it contents money. this is to avoid them delaying with the Box.don't let them know that is money that is in that Box.


Thanks and Remain Blessed.
Secretary, Charles Ndube(ESQ)

[jasonmcareedj]

rom: newman_roberts040@yahoo.co.jp << WTF? Yahoo Japan??
You may not know this sender.Mark as safe|Mark as unsafe
Sent: 18 February 2008 18:53:28
To: newman_roberts040@yahoo.co.jp

Dearest one << Saucy start, liking this guy already..

l know this mail will come as a surprise to you. I have a proposal for you to this project however is not mandatory << First Over-use of Engrish Languagez nor will I in any manner compel you to honor against your will, Your profile pushed me to send you this mail, << Lol!Jas Has a Pushy Profile?! I am Master Newman Roberts, I am 22 years old and the only Son of my late parents Dr. and Mrs. Roberts Didie. My father was a highly reputable farmer (a cocoa merchant) in cote d' ivories during his days. << So, wait, this is a CHOCOLATE scam???? I am IN Already..

It is sad to say that he was poisoned and passed away mysteriously in France during one of his business trips abroad on 12th. May 2007. << Wait, Poisoned? On a Business Trip? Like what are the chances of that? Was he THE JACKAL? Though his sudden death was linked or rather suspected to have been masterminded by my uncle who traveled with him at that
time. But God knows the truth! << Uncle eh? That sounds plausable.. My mother died when I was just 4 years old, and since then my father took me so special. << Whatnow? TOOK YOU SPECIAL? Like, in the butthole? Jesus man.. I didn't need to know that.. but it WOULD explain whay YOU POISONED HIM!!!

Before he made the trip to France that lead to my misfortune (his death) << What? Are you Him? Wait, did you kill yourself to change identity?? He called me and explained to me the reason why he will make this trip and also told me that he deposited a fund that contain US$ 12.5000000 (Thelve Million Five Hundred Thousand Dollars) << THELVE MILLIONZ? No, thats TWELVE BUCKS FIFTY CENT you asshole.. Don't they teach you the meaning of a decimal point in clown school?? in a Bank there in Abidjan Ivory Coast and that this money is for an investment purpose overseas.

He gave me the certificate that he used for the deposit of the fund and other vital documents of his asset, << Wait, pictures of his asspipe?? Ew Ew Ew.. after his death l went to the Bank and establish
ownership of the fund. Now l need your assistance to move this fund to your country for investment as that has been my late father's aim before his death. << I see, so he went to France to get poisoned with the twelve fiddy, and was going to invest the 12.50 in Ireland, from France.. Yeh, that makes sense. Now permit me to ask these few questions: -

Can you honestly help me receive the said fund in your country ?, << No, it will have to be dishonestly
What will you like to take as your commission to assist me in this project? << eh, the 12.50
Please can you kindly arrange a letter of invitation to enable me migrate to your country after this fund might have lodge into your account? << Ahh i see, you want me to MARRY you now.. hmmm, that's a high penelty for a dead man's 12.50 - i WILL require a photo, of both YOU and the 12.50 plzktnx . If this proposal arouse your interest << Fu*k yeah, now you are talking, my intrest is like sooooooo aroused right now kindly contact me back with my email address immediately. << Wait, if you don't know what your email address is, how will you get the email i send back to you?
Thanks for your Understanding << It's tuff, but yes, i understand.. You poor Identityless abused child with no math skills whatsoever..

Anticipat Your Cooperation.
Master Newman Roberts << Tnx Master Bob, we'll be in touch about the twelve fiddy..

[playthatbeat]

lol, thats some original frontier gibberish right thar..

i wonder, is there a university of shite scams in africa? SOMEBODY has to be scamming these poor idiots into attempting these scams!! er.. wait now..

[Karld]

I always get them poxy bank ones from some dude in Africa

[playthatbeat]

Another GEM - packed with phonenumbers etc..

From The Desk Of Dr.IDEMA ZONGO.
Senior Staff In File Department,
African Development Bank A.D.B
Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso
West Africa.

Private Number/ 00226 76 41 92 20 .
Private Email/ idemazogo19@yahoo.fr << France is in africa now?



PLANE CRASH WEB SITE. http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa...ash/index.html

( "REMITTANCE OF $15 MILLION U.S.A DOLLARS CONFIDENTIAL IS THE CASE")

Compliment Of The Season, << Whatnow?

On a very good day. << So, what do you do on a BAD DAY?? I am (Dr.IDEMA ZONGO) a senior staff in file department in African development bank (A.D.B).I got your contact from a Yahoo Tourist Search. << Wow! I r an Tourist?!

When i was searching for a foreign partner i assured of your capability and reliability to champion this business opportunity when i prayed to God about you. << God is a personal friend, we play poker twice a month.. In my department we discovered an abandoned sum of $ 15 million U.S.A dollars ( Fifteen Million U.S.A Dollars). In an account that belongs to one of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in (Friday December 26,2003 ) in a plane crash.

Since we got information about his death, << It takes 5 fuc*ing years for news of this sort to reach you in Lagos? You need faster internets pal we have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it unless somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines,

But unfortunately we learnt that all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim. It is therefore upon this discovery that I and one official in my department now decided to make this business proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and we don’t want this money to go into the bank treasury as unclaimed bill. << Whatnow? You want to COMMIT A BANKING FRAUD?? Don't they HANG you for that in Nigeria??

The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remained unclaimed after five years, the money will be transferred into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in this business is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner. << Ahh, now the 5-years to cop-on makes sense to me, this MUST be legit, you are right my new best-friend-in-the-banking-trade, let's get it ON

And a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner. << Whatnow? a WHAT? Isn't that a Rodent? We agree that 30 % of this money will be for you as foreign partner, in respect to the provision of a foreign account, 10 % will be set aside for expenses incurred during the business and 60 % would be for me and my woman colleague. There after I and my colleague will visit your country for disbursement according to the percentages indicated. << Wait, DISBURSE? I don't do Kinky secks, you may be dissapointed.. but i like those numbers - 30% of 25billionsquids is like, LOTS.. i am SO in.. Yes i am..

Therefore to enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you as arranged, you must apply first to the bank as relations or next of kin of the deceased indicating your bank name, your bank account number, your private telephone and fax number for easy and effective communication and location where the money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text of the application << wow! You will fax me back mah own stuff? Cool, then i will KNOW it's a done deal and all Legit and stuff.. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is hitch free and that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required arrangements have been made for the transfer. << At last, now i know the S.I.-Unit for FEAR!! I thought it was the PLANK, but now i know fear has a physical form, and is measured by the ATOM.. wow.. You are so Clever, let me fetch mah bank details..

You should contact me on my number / 00226 76 41 92 20 . << Checks out , is a number in Burkina Faso.. Answered by a man with a tennisball in his mouth..
immediately as soon as you receive this letter. Trusting to hear from you
immediately. << Letter?? Lol. Letters are for Alphabets fool..

Yours faithfully,

Dr.IDEMA ZONGO. << Wow! a Doctor, Must be in your country you need to be a doctor to work in banking? A doctor of doctoring the books perhaps?

POST SCRITUM :You have to keep everything secret as to enable the transfer to move very smoothly in to the account you will prove to the bank. As you finished reading this letter call me immediately so that we discuss very well over this business. Please call me and inform me that you received my mail, because i don't go to net always. << LETTER? wait, i explained this, we are on the INTERWEBZ you asshole, This Discounted Scam you bought of an equally crap conman is like 15-20 years old, EMAIL you fool, not LETTER


Ya.com ADSL 24h + Llamadas Nacionales y Locales 24h - desde 9,95 €/mes+IVA. << Wait, and add for ya.com? aren't they SPAINs leading bogie interwebz enabler? ya, i think they is..